I feel as though I have been blessed in that I have not had to deal with a major tragedy at this time in my life [well I suppose this is relative, meaning, what may not be a tragedy to me, someone else close to me may have thought it was 'tragic'. Or if I am being a drama queen, I could classify something as tragic...] I also feel like thinking, and writing, my thoughts will cause my to jinx myself. I guess the reason this comes up is that I think everyone has their own battles. While in my family I haven't had to deal with a sick family member, we've had our battles. But it's always in the back of my mind: when does it all come crashing down? Will I be so unfortunate that everything "bad" will happen at once? This is my fear. How will I maintain a balance?
Does this make me a pessimist? I always have thought I was more of a half-glass-empty-kind of person...I also believe that if I believe that I'm a half-glass-empty person I will BE that person. That's called the self-fulling prophecy, where if you BELIEVE something long enough, that's what happens. Just like if you're really crabby or sad, if you smile, the endorphins get sent to you brain to think you're happy, so then you actually do feel happy. Did that make sense? It did to me.
I'm still feeling a little overwhelmed and overloaded. This weekend should help with that. I may go out tonight to 'celebrate' Halloween, AKA go out with the girls, just an excuse to put on a really short skirt and low shirt with hooker boots and call it an outfit. Saturday evening David and I (don't ask) are going to Harlow's (grandma's boyfriend) Halloween party and we're dressing as Clark Kent and Lois Lane. Cute <3.>
Romeo, save me,
they're trying to tell me how to feel
This love is difficult, but it's real
Don't be afraid, we'll make it out of this mess
It's a love story, baby, just say yes