I spoke too soon.
I don't know what I did to warrant it, maybe I'm completely and totally off base. To be honest, this is what I hope is true.
Five dates, countless emails and hours spent on the phone and I'm left analyzing why I was cancelled on twice and he is conveniently booked for the next 10 days. I didn't do anything outlandish on our last date, I don't think. If he isn't interested anymore, fine. But tell me. The worst thing a guy can do is leave you to wonder. He can sugar coat it. He can tell me that he isn't interested and just leave it at that. I'm a big girl and I can handle so much more than someone saying they've lost interest.
So I am left to wonder. What's wrong with me? Between him, Corey, Nathan (who completely vanished after three months of frequent dating)... it's all a whole bunch of nothing. And I knowwwww it's not me, it's him. But it's always them. So is it really me? Obviously it is. And I know that if it isn't there for them, it's just not there. I get it, I do. Let's just communicate.
As I go on in the dating world, I learn more. I was probably too forward, too soon. I started to let my guard down. I just feel so misled. I wasn't even looking for anything in the first place.
The good news is, I've lost nothing but a few weeks and I've learned more about myself.